My living room is a mess. It’s his play room. And he isn’t yet good at picking up his toys. There are times the mess drives me crazy.
But then I sit here and watch him play. Or I watch him eat (tonight we had pizza). And I just stare at him. Jonathan regularly tells me I’m so in love with my son. He isn’t wrong.
Watching him do the most simple things just amazes me. These are the moments that bring me the most joy.
After we lost Stephen I didn’t know if I would ever again feel happiness. I was sure I never again would have a real smile on my face. Logan is how I got through that time.
The first couple weeks even holding him hurt. But then holding him helped. And over time watching him put a real smile on my face.
That boy is my life. Over two years later and he is still putting a smile on my face. Just by being him.
I can so deal with the messy living room to watch him happily playing with his toys and lining up his trucks and trains. It makes him so happy. And that makes me happy.
?TWM
#claylojr #lifeafterloss #thatwidowedmom
