Well, it may have been the last day….but today I did my taxes. And I’m super proud of myself.
Last year was the first year doing it without Stephen. And I was doing his last taxes. I was a mess. I cried. I got drunk. I just couldn’t handle the idea of doing his last ever taxes. And add to that it was the first time I was really doing taxes alone. Like I went to that tax place. But alone.
I had never done taxes without the help of a boyfriend, husband, boss or mom before. There was always someone with me. But last year I was alone.
And it was one more thing that made it clear that Stephen was really gone. I handled it so much better this year.
Jonathan reminded me that I could do it. That he was just a phone call away and would come join me if it was too much. And I am so proud of myself for not needing to call him. For making it through the appointment without crying. Even after having to list myself as widowed on taxes for the first time as 2019 was the first full year he was gone all year.
I know things like this seem so small to other people. And when people look at me now they see a girl that has a new love. But moving forward in life doesn’t make things like this less sad. It still highlights that my husband is dead.
So I’m just super glad I was able to do it. Super proud of myself for finding the strength to stand on my own and get it done. Even if it was at the last min lol.
?TWM
#ididit #taxes #thatwidowedmom